Never ever give up

In Internal Family Systems, participants get to familiarize themselves with all the parts they've tried hard to disown. Yet, they are all of them. In this therapeutic methodology, we wouldn't even be allowed to call some of these parts good and some bad; they all 'are', they exist, they're normal, and we can be complete and happy people acknowledging all of them.

So I tried hard to love the unsuccessful parts of me, the parts that are so bad with money, the parts that still haven't made it into a long-term relationship, the parts that keep running away despite the rest of me wanting to stay and ground, the parts that sabotage my diet, and the parts that will never forge good relationships with the members of my biological family. In other words, I tried to love the loser and the outcast in me.

It involved some tears falling down, too. The cat I've been looking after literally jumped into my lap when I was too far down the line to think rationally. Many tears fell on her shiny terracotta fur. 

Animals are such blessings in this world. They can take a lot of human emotions and not even budge. When you calm down, they shrug it off and hop away. While many of us empaths cannot contain all of our feelings and still choose to carry other people's shit on our shoulders too.

The other day, I held a monologue with myself, and I got a revelation. I thought, hm, my imagination really doesn't have any limits. It's the selling part. Once I finally start selling my shit, then I'll be a rich lady.

And then it struck me. I won't get rich until I put something up on sale! I've written 3 e-books, devised a coaching program, composed numerous blog posts, and have a health course and a vaguely mapped-out potential self-love mini-course... yeah, creation is not the issue! It's me putting it out there; that's the drag! If I don't sell anything, I don't have a business; I have ideas.

It all comes down to marketing and communication, doesn't it? I thought I studied it for a year in Brisbane, but apparently, it was as useful as a piece of garbage. 

Likewise, I need ongoing support to keep myself accountable and consistent. I need to learn current technical skills, and I need bullet-proof therapeutic methods to help myself and others. I'm starting to think that Theta healing is not it. I've spent about 3,000 GBP on it, and overall, likely half a million on all degrees, diplomas, and alternative healing and coaching certificates so far, but hey, definitely no regrets. I'm just wondering what the real shit is or what my signature method will be.

I have some new ones in mind.

Neurodecoding?

Rapid Resolutional Therapy?

How am I supposed to get professional help without any capital now?

I quit my job prematurely, but well, the amount of toxic stress that fell off of me was probably worth it.

Also, I must be the embodiment of what I preach, so - I must never ever give up.